I don't believe it is a coincidence that the words "Bull Season" begin with BS. The Cowboy, wth a very serious look on his face, instructed me that my book was to be put on hold for one month because it is "bull season." There were looks exchanged and words uttered. Oh dear Cowboy, don't you know me any better than that? I can multitask. Yes...I'm THAT good. LOL!
I've been entering bull data in spreadsheets until I've about gone blind. Apparently, according to Jennifer, I go into some sort of a bull statistic coma too, which I was unaware of. I'm not quite the same creative person I usually am after hours of data entry. I know it makes me feel grouchy and causes me anxiety but I was unaware that it also makes me brain dead. Thanks. Jen. This could explain a lot about a lot of people that I know but that's for somebody else to investigate. I'm not working for 60 Minute here. I AM working for K&T Cattle Co though and I can tell you will 99.9 percent certainty, the size of each scrotum on the place. For the bulls anyway. I don't have the actual records on the Cowboy and Angus's still haven't dropped. HAHAHAHAHAHA!
I am so weird and think about the strangest things while typing and as I was typing in their dates of births, and apparently in this trance that I slip into, I'd have to text the children and tell them what bulls they share birthdays with. Hahahaha! I also said to myself "Awe, he'll be two in April." Which leads me to my next story.
When I was little, we are all over at Chicken Annie's for dinner. If you've never been to Chicken Annie's in Pittsburg, KS, you must immediately put down your phone and go eat there. Life changing. Much like Taco Town and Bamboo Garden if you are from Carthage, Missouri, Anyway, we were at Chicken Annie's and my whole family was there. This person came up to our table and noticed how ridiculously beautiful I was as a small child and said "Awe, how old are you??" And I said, without missing a beat, I said, "Two in April!" My grandpa laughed and laughed and told this story until the day he died. I was brilliant and beautiful. Hahahahahaha. So my bad boys around here... well they will all be "2 in April." If you need a scrotal measurement, let me know. I know it too. LOL!
We were working calves this morning and praise the Lord, Emma is home for spring break and her boyfriend J.T. came up for a few days too, so we had some really good help. He grew up on a cattle ranch and knows his stuff and that makes for a very happy Cowboy. They had a good system working with everyone doing specific jobs. We had a couple of hired guys bringing up the cattle, Emma giving shots and cutting tags on one side, J.T. giving shots on the other and the Cowboy was cutting the nuts off the bulls calves in the chute, while J.T. would hold up the tails. Angus and I were basically doing nothing but watching, helping fill an occasional syringe, pick up trash and Angus was scarfing down bull balls that were not large and juicy enough to keep. J.T. mentioned we may not want to let him in the house for a few days. Hahahahaha!
About 20 or so calves in, J.T. looked looked at me and said "I'd really love to give Kevin a wet willy while he's all trapped in the chute like that" and then acted it out for me by licking his finger and making the smack sound and twisting it in the air. My mouth dropped open. Folks, the Cowboy is kind of a bad ass and people are generally scared of him. Trickery doesn't happen at the ranch, especially if we are working. It was the greatest idea I'd heard in 20 years. I said "I will give you $100.00 if you do it." He's like "100???? I'm totally in." Well we are just dying laughing and giddy with anticipation. I finally enlightened one of the other guys so that he could hold the tail while J.T. did the dirty. J.T. at one point said "I'm so nervous!!" which had me really rolling. I was literally cackling at this point. All of a sudden, I saw J.T. take the tail with one hand, slide off his glove, lick his finger and pop it in Kevin's ear. I don't know if he said wet willy or not because I was on the ground! THE LOOK ON THE COWBOY'S FACE WAS PRICELESS!!! Shock, anger, and a bit of pride all wrapped up in a crooked little smile with a revengeful gleam in his eyes. Death was near for J.T. Hahahahaha! "You see I'm holding a knife right???" I was LOSING IT. I haven't laughed that hard in so long. J.T. was staying on his side of the chute with me. He knew I'd protect him. Hahahahaha! It was totally worth the $100. He climbed out of the chute and looked at him and said "Just remember this. Every time you back into the box at every college rodeo, know that I'm behind you." Oh man that kid won big points with me today. I'm pretty sure he did with the Cowboy too. It was priceless.
I was sharing the story with Quincy and Colt and Colt said "I wouldn't have done it for $1000.00." HAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! I laughed and said "I know you wouldn't." Hahahahah! Which is exactly why it is so funny. 99.9 percent of the population feel the exact someway. No way would anybody do it. That J.T., well that kid is not in the norm. He's ornery to the core and I sure do enjoy him.
Both of my girls did really good in the boyfriend department. That Colt is about the sweetest thing that ever lived. I made hamburgers last night and all the kids came over for dinner. I had made jalapeño poppers a few nights ago and I remember reading in The Pioneer Woman's recipe that if you put them on a hamburger, you'd never be able to eat another burger without them, so I heated them up and put them on the burgers. Omgoodness. She wasn't lying. Colt informed Quincy in an apologetic tone that he was sorry but this had to happen from now on. LOL! That Ree apparently knows her stuff. Good boyfriends are just a blessing from God and I thank Him daily for the two in my girls' lives. It sure makes it easier to let them go when you've got young men like that taking care of them. God was sure good to me and mine.
J.T. is staying a few more days. I'll let you know if he survives. (wink face)
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